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The moment I stepped aboard the Emirates Boeing 777, I was enthralled. After decades of trudging past the posh seats on the way to the back of the plane, suddenly I was a premium passenger.
What joy! Just four seats abreast, compared with 10 at the back of the plane. Acres of personal space.
I have flown on Emirates in economy class and know what to expect. Great cabin crew. Ample food and drink. Outstanding in-flight entertainment.
What more could one want?
Well, how about the chance to “look forward to a comfortable journey in some of the best seats at 40,000ft”? That’s what you get in business class, according to the airline’s publicity. Plus the chance to “remix business with pleasure,” apparently.
As I looked forward to my first experience in business class on one of the world’s great airlines, I wasn’t delving deeply into the small print on the website. Had I done so, I might have read: “Disclaimer: Emirates operates a mixed fleet of earlier and later models of A380 and B777 aircraft. Products, services and features on actual flights may vary depending on routes and aircraft configuration.”
Almost as soon as I had boarded and gasped at the sheer glory of being a premium passenger, I realised I was looking at first class, which occupies row 1 and 2, rather than business class.
I continued into a cabin with seven seats across.
That’s weird, I thought. Having walked through long-haul business cabins this year on British Airways and Singapore Airlines, I know I am looking for discreet and spacious seating in return for my high spending. So why would premium economy be here rather than behind business class?
I asked a member of the cabin crew. “This is business class,” he said.
He and his colleagues were marvellous. When they came around with pre-flight champagne I declined and said I’d love some tea. Five minutes later a proper cuppa was served at my seat.
The tea was perfect. But even for those of us who are not connoisseurs of business class, the seat wasn’t. I am accustomed to 10-abreast economy class, with seats just 17 inches across. Business class buys you lots more legroom, but hardly any more elbow room.
With seat dividers that draw their inspiration from the Berlin Wall cutting into the width profile, everything is narrow and, dare I say it, coffin-like.
The closest experience I have had is in the dentist’s chair. To be fair, being on an Emirates plane is a significant improvement on root canal treatment: kind people bring you tea in a cup (or Moet & Chandon Imperial Brut in a glass) rather than Novocaine in a needle. They don’t do that at my dentist (yet).
Bedtime? Good luck with that. The seats are described as “angled lie-flat”. In my book, “flat” means horizontal. But on the plane I was on, Emirates’ business class seats declined to recline any closer than 14 degrees to the horizon.
That is still quite enough of a tilt to get in the way if you happen to be one of the three business passengers in each row who have to step over your travelling companion to reach the loo.
An Emirates spokesperson said: “As a global airline, we place the comfort and wellbeing of our customers as a top priority. In line with our brand promise to fly customers better, we continue at pace with our multi-billion dollar retrofit programme to fully refurbish more than 200 aircraft with new interiors and the highly lauded premium economy cabin.
“So far, we’ve rolled out 40 fully refurbished aircraft (27 A380s and 13 Boeing 777s) and look forward to deploying more refurbished aircraft across our network in the coming months.”
The basic problem seems to be this: Emirates has a brilliant “hard product” on some of its fleet, ie generous space and proper flat beds. But elsewhere, seven-abreast seating and non-lie-flat beds are all a bit 20th century. The airline should recognise the deficiencies in its pricing and publicity.
While Emirates continues its fleet refurbishment “at pace”, I commend the airline’s excellent economy class.
Simon Calder, also known as The Man Who Pays His Way, has been writing about travel for The Independent since 1994. In his weekly opinion column, he explores a key travel issue – and what it means for you
