5.
“We didn’t get married, but I dated a woman from a much wealthier background than myself for about five years — and we very much thought we’d get married. … Her family disliked me from day one and never gave me a chance. It was a really intense dislike; they consistently made me uncomfortable, purposefully even. They would make fun of what I was used to eating…and they went to the ritziest restaurants in the city consistently — at least once a week. They wouldn’t really speak to me at the dinner table, rather they would speak to each other, and if I offered an opinion, they would look at me silently and continue on. It was ironic in my view because I was actually the most well-educated person at the table with two university degrees, and yet, they consistently acted like I could have nothing of value to say.”
“They refused to treat my mother like a person, they will help no one, they had this weird thing where they were incredibly wealthy but refused to make enough food for the table, they treated both of their adult children like 12-year-olds, they had poor hygiene, etc.
On my end, my girlfriend didn’t visit my family home very much. She didn’t like the commute. When she did, she would make a mess in the kitchen and never clean up, etc. I could tell she was judging what we ate. When we invited her parents to come out to our suburb and have some Thai food, they hired a driver because they didn’t want to drive to this area themselves (it’s not remotely dangerous, it’s incredibly vanilla)…and they spent the entire time at dinner mentioning how surprised they were that there was anyone in the restaurant and how surprised they were that the food was good. They also had this habit of treating waitstaff like robots — ‘get this, get that,’ never looking them in the eyes.
This one time, my ex’s parents went to Italy for a month and didn’t bother to check if they left enough food for their dog. My ex can’t drive, and I wasn’t in the state, so my lovely mother drove to the other side of the city, bought the food, drove it to the house, and drove home. It was a 200-dollar bag of food, mind you. Her parents never said thank you and never offered to repay. That’s the general vibe.
… Basically, being with me long-term seemed to bring tension into her elitist-as-fuck family, and it made me reluctant to date someone from that background again, which I know is irrational, but God, was her family the worst.”
